the feeling of not being here...

just a reflection for today.. 

It's been for a few days actually, this feeling of not being here, physically yes, but it seems my spirit is away and wanted to be somewhere.

It's been more than two months since I left my second home, the office where I used to be comfortable (for the past 21 years).  I'm now working in a new company and fitting in is a struggle almost everyday.  I'm not used to this kind of struggle.  I'm a person that can easily adapt, blend, camouflage or whatever you call it.  It's a trait that any traveler should have.

But the struggle is real.  I felt being forced to this.  I felt so hopeless or much better - helpless and I don't understand why.  I'm totally lost.  All I know for now is that I needed this job, I need to be here for now.

The urge of being somewhere is too strong.  I needed to be somewhere doing a different thing.  I need to be there wherever it is....